We've all got thoughts and impulses that don't always make us proud. It's like our own little garden of good and evil going on in there with much of the evil fueled by insecurity. Where it all starts to go awry is when we act on those impulses (consciously or not), causing pain or embarrassment to others and shaming ourselves. While there are an infinite number of ways that you can unleash your inner neediness upon an unsuspecting world, these are my favourites.

Amanda's Ten Favourite Ways to Let the World Know You Feel Inadequate:

10. Win an award and fist pump madly without thanking the donor or acknowledging the prowess of the other candidates.

9. Lose an award, contest, or job opportunity, and refuse to congratulate the winner and thank the judges for their consideration.

8. Post your latest project or achievement on Facebook/Twitter/Blog/Press Release without acknowledging the people who helped you accomplish your amazing feat.

7. Start most sentences with "I" - so simple yet so effective.

6. Talk incessantly about your latest car, vacation, or house to someone who does not enjoy the same financial freedom (or love affair with credit) that you do.

5. Pontificate to someone about something of which you know nothing, but they know quite a bit - this works particularly well if you speak loudly and you are older/they are younger, you are male/they are female.

4. Be an attention whore (almost as beloved as clowns). Describe your harrowing medical dramas, celebrate the clipping of your toenails with cake and balloons (see? clowns), or post melancholy/dire/sexually suggestive entries on Facebook and watch them come (go) running.

3. Tweet (on the Twitter) incessantly about where you're checking in and with whom you are socializing, oh so gaily. "#tea with the #queen in #yyj" name dropping in 140 characters- Sweet!

2. Whatever you do, don't take responsibility. Make excuses as if your life depended on it (well, your ego does) and make every effort to blame someone else. In a pinch you can blame the weather (It's SAD), the moon (it's full), the booze (it's good), or the world (it hates you).

1. And here at last, my #1 way to unleash your inner wretch for the world to see. Disrespect your friend, spouse, parent, or child publicly. Slice through those delicate bonds of trust like a chef at Benihana's by spilling secrets, mocking, making condescending remarks, and acting lasciviously (toward someone other than your spouse). This is the hallmark of the truly insecure and the one most likely to evoke disdain and revoke intimacy privileges. You like sleeping on the sofa, right?

While we all know one (or a dozen) people who let their insecurity fly as above, chances are good that we've also wallowed in the fetid waters of small character, once or twice. Lest you think I hate everyone and everything they do, let me reassure you. I have met tons of spectacularly gracious, respectful people of all ages, education levels, and socio-economic backgrounds. I'll tell you about them next time. For now, I leave you with a song.